Soon after the second birthday of my daughter -Noelle- I noticed a tremendous change in her temperament and behavior. She was no more the same obedient baby. She became aggressive, showed her likes and dislikes, would throw tantrums and keep me on my toes to feed her, to bath her and to dress her up.
So I realized that it is going to be a tough exhausting year ahead for me as a mother and dealing with my toddler would not be as smooth as it used to be. Now she is 28 months old, still in the trouble two phase, drives me crazy, crazy, crazy, love!
In the past three weeks, she has decided that going to bed is not her cup of tea. She used to be so easy to put down for bed (either nap or night time, which is already past the "normal" toddler bedtime), but lately she wants to continue to play or watch TV/movie until the wee hours of the night (read : midnite). Oh well, I guess that's what happens when kids start to grow up and realize that their bed time is not the same as Mama and Papa's bed time. However, I keep reminding her that we are in charge and we know what's best for her.. Yeah, like she understands those abstract thoughts!
She never respond to NO! She will keep doing the thing, until she learn a lesson. Last week, we went to church, and because it's winter, she dressed in long sleeves jumper and leggings. During the mass, she felt bored and start amusing herself, so she start to rolled up the sleeves up to her elbow, and I said "No, don't do that, Noelle. It's cold. We need to keep you warm" while unrolled it, aaaand she rolled it up again.
The scene repeated 3 times, finally when she rolled up the sleeve again, I "help" her with rolling it neatly and a bit higher, on both arms. She looked satisfied, and back to play in her seat, and 5 minutes later she asked me to roll out her sleeves because "It's Kod" (that's how she says cold). I learn that sometimes, I just need to pick the things worth to fight for because she need to learn to understand the love behind the word NO.
In this terrible two's months, I learn that Noelle isn't trying to be defiant or rebellious on purpose. She is just trying to express her growing independence and doesn't have the language skills to easily express her needs. I learn that this lead to hiting and temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way.
Shopping would be a fun/not fun activities because she insist to drag the wheelie shopping basket (with her small feet, it will take ages to do a quick shopping in the morning) and I dont like when she put things that I don't intend to buy because she will fight me when I put those things back in the shelves and she'll throwing tantrum by crying screaming and stomping her feet until she got distracted.
If she got upset, she'll push anything that near her. The other day, she was standing next to the coffee table, and got upset so she pushed the books and stack of magazines from the table, I just eyeing her when they fell on the floor. I took a deep breath, show no interest in her tantrum, and she (hopefully) will learn that throwing tantrum is not the way to get whatever she want.
The funny thing is, when she got upset and there was nothing near her, she will go find a nearest object, eventho it was 3 meters away from her original spot, sometimes it was in other room. When she find it, she'll dramatically push the object to show me that she's upset. Too funny! I laughed and she got upset even more.
Three weeks ago, we were having a 5-day trip in New South Wales, and I expect her to have a bit of unpleasant moments during the flight, such as kicking the front seat when I put on her seatbelt, repeatedly unbuckle the seatbelt, taking all the armrest (she can be persistent), "reading" the inflight magazine loudly and keep clicking the button to call the stewardess, just the way she want it.. The first time it happens, I apologize to the crew and asked to be ignored if the lights ON again :) Goodiebag from Qantas, and inflight entertainment only kept her entertained when she want to, but when she got bored, she'll amuse herself with things that make me want to pull my hair! At this point, I was wondering how nice it would be to have a private jet *wink wink*
Other toddler behaviors she has come up are really kind of icky. For example, she gets a mouthful of spit, smacking her lips in the shape of letter O and produces a big bubble, saliva bubble, and it stays as long as she wants. It’s so gross and awesome too at the same time. I tried but never succeed, and she caught me doing that. She thinks it’s hilarious, and now she always showing off her "talent".. Unfortunately, that behavior will also probably stick around for a while because I couldn't help myself saying "Wow" when I see the big bubble... Blast that "positive reinforcement", especially after I encouraged her to show her father the art of saliva bubble making.
Another icky behavior : She drinks her bathwater. *Shudder!* Thankfully, she showered first, shampoo and soap, brushing her feet, rinse all over until squeaky clean, and then I let her soak in her giant bucket while I shower. I keep her entertained with colourful sticky letters on the wall but still, I know she drinks her bathwater.. I just hope that she didn't pee in her bucket that is. I beg, yell, threaten and physically make her stop doing that, but she's going to do it which I know, until she grown out of it. She looks at me with big smile, dip her face in to the water for 1 second and got mouthful of water then gargle, and if I am lucky, she'll spit it out, or she just drink it and says "Mmmm yummy" (she said it with raised eyebrows and nodding head)... I shake my head and say " Please stop that, if you want to drink, I'll get your bottle, Noelle". She just laughs and dip her head again to get more water. Demonic!
I’m learning that toddlers have a way of defying the “norm” and coming up with wacky ways to keep life interesting. Some of her strange behaviors: she loves the feel of cold things, so she just open the fridge, take a bottle of juice, or a grape, or a brocolli, or a carrot, or an egg (she's exactly one meter tall and can reach the egg shelf) and will put the cold thing on her cheek and say "Kod" over and over again.
She is also fascinated by belly buttons. There's a commercial ad on TV, it's a woman wearing jegging (jeans+legging) and teeny tiny white shirt, showing her bellybutton. Everytime she sees the ads, she will automatically pull her shirt, touching her bellybutton, and then asked to see my bellybutton and then her father's. Thankfully, it never happen when there were other people in the house, otherwise we're having belly button party :D
She love to sniffs food, feeling it hot or cold first, take a teeny tiny bit before decide to eat it or leave it. And I love the fact that she loves to eat veggies, like brocoli and carrots and peas so I dont have to raise my voice to make her eat her greens :) She loves to humming (mostly made up songs), and talking to her toys, sometimes it is peaceful and shoothing knowing I live with other person in the house during the day.
This cheeky girl also loves to tease me. She likes to pick her nose, and say "Eww" to the 'treasure' she find.. And when I asked her to hand me the treasure on her finger, she will draw the finger to her mouth and say "Aum" *with naughty look in her eyes* as if she was going to eat it. My reaction? Of course I panic and disgust at the same time and tried to stop her, but she only smile and got that twinkle in her eyes! Aaarrrggghhh! Is it only my child or any of you know other child like this?
My daughter's terrible two's can exhaust me in mere moments, but I wouldn't trade these days for anything *cough*. She can drive me crazy and when I think I can't stand another annoying toddler thing, she does something cute that melts my heart!
The other day, Noelle was in her highchair having brekkie, I was sitting close by to supervise, distract, fetch more food, whatever she need. I was exhausted from a long night (sometimes my eye and my brain refuse to fall asleep until 4am, so I just lie down awake, in the dark). I had my head resting on my hand and my eyes closed. She reached over and handed me her most precious possession —her blanky bunny, formerly named Pinky Rabbit- and said, “Mama, Mami” (she now can say Bunny actually, but refused to call her blankie with Bunny and insist it's Mami).. I could have melted and got teary eyed, how can this angel/monster child show me such a love, comforting me with thing that she know always can comforting her?
One of her most endearing behaviors is when she bow, pick up any toy, tell it "Hi -insert name of toy- " and kiss it. This is super cute with her stuffed animals, doll babies, but it definitely makes me laugh when she does it to her ball or a toy train or legos. After her attention span wanes, she'll drop the toy but ask it if it's okay. The scene was something like this: "Hi Chabi ( for Charlie Bear)! *pick up the toy* "Mwach" *kiss, drop the bear* "Uh-oh" *looking at me, then pick up the bear again* "Chabi, are you okay?".. Superb, one of the thing I pulled ot of my mind everytime I want to smile for my self.
Sometimes when I wash the dishes or cooking, she just randomly comes up to me, give my leg a hug, then running again to play by herself. Other times, I was reading and out of nowhere she grabbed my hand until I was standing up and push me on the bum, it means she wants us to be a train! Chugga chugga chug chug.. We travelled around the house as a train! She will laugh and squeal gleefully..
At 2 and a half year, she still not speaking properly, I mean, in one or two word only, not in a whole sentence, except reciting whatever she hear from her fave movie or ad. When she hungry, she'll come to me and say "Mama, eat?".. or "Mik?" for milk, "Shouwe" for shower and etc.. But when she tried to speak in sentence, only she and God knows what it mean.. I have tried to speak to her, develop her speech skills but the progress still so so.. But I love the fact that she knows her ABCs and 123s, shapes and objects, hundred of vocabs, I just hope that she will talk in sentence soon and able to say her name. I teach her to say Noelle, but she never tried to say it while I know she love to repeat everything I said to her. But she came up with her own name Gojes (from gorgeous) because I always say Gorgeous when she smiles, after I brushed her hair, when she smile and humming and dancing.
She loves to watch me doing the laundry, she'll said "Papa!" when I had my husband's shirt or pants. She knows my clothes, except my shirts, she'll said "Papa" because I rarely wear buttoned shirt and my husband has lots of them. She knows her clothing, and said "Gojes" which means its her.
One of my favourite moments is when she says I love you and make a gesture for it too. I (point to herself), love (make a love shape with both hands), you (point to the person). And when I said back to her, Mama (she point at me) love (make the love shape again), Gojes (point to herself).. There's no confusion in there, she knows I love her..
I love when she comes up to me and planted a kiss. Ooooh I can't and won't resist those puckered lips, because if you asked for a kiss, she won't give you a kiss, she only offer you her cheek! Whatta cheeky girl!
Other heart melting moment, it happened on last Friday night. I was sick of looking at the never tidy living room and Noelle's bedroom. She loves to play in both rooms so there will be always her toys in here and there. I want to enjoy the Friday night watching DVDs or TV programs in a proper clean and tidy living room, so I started to tidy up the living room, took all the stranded toys back to her room, then vacuuming the room while my husband watching TV, in the same room.
Then, I started sorting all the toys, and books, and softies and put them all in their places, and vacuuming Noelle's bedroom. Then my husband asked something, and because I was a bit tired and sick of the routine domestic chores, honestly I don't want to talk at all, so I just said, "I can't hear you". Then he shouted to topped the sound of the vacuum, and I snapped, "I am working".. Well, I was a bit upset because he did not help me, not even offering. *Sorry I dragged you in this story, babe*
And then, when the vaccuum machine stopped and I was retracting the cable, Noelle run to me and hug me, and pat me in the back, and saying something that sounds like "Soowwy".." That's her word for sorry, and if it was right, I don't know what she is sorry for, is it sorry for messing up her bedroom, or sorry for not helping me? Whatever it is, suddenly I just feel warm with love and sad at the same time because I feel so ungrateful.
Then, I praised the Lord for giving me this loving and caring child, which make me learn to be a better person. Yes, life is a neverending school, and sometimes this small person can teach a lot.
Oooh toddlers, totally baffling, totally charming... What a roller coaster a toddler can be. I'll just keep hanging on and try to enjoy the ride! Wait up for me, kiddo!
I love you, Noelle..
For better or worse..
